I think I’m dead. I felt icicles brush past my calf and could feel purple digits desperately trying to absorb warmth from 3 pairs of socks, 2 duvets and a blankie.

If it wasn’t so painful, I’d contort myself so that my cheeks could thaw them out, instead of fuelling hell’s fires. OMG. The last time I can remember feeling this bad, was having measles as a child.

Yes, I’m being stubborn. I probably should have gone to the doctor and got the latest anti-biotic and super-duper painkillers, but I believe in experiencing all of life’s roller-coaster. To fully appreciate those highs, you’ve got to get down there in the lows. I know how much I’m going to appreciate being healthy again!

Pen’s bedroom is a lovely place to convalesce. One window looks onto the garden with a lovely big Frangipani tree whose blossoms are long dried, but I swear I can still smell their perfumed scent. And the other window overlooks the valley, where a tall fir hides a view of the waterfall, but not the sound. There are worse places to be ill 😉

It’s Mum’s 70th birthday today, wow!

Marcel and I phoned Mum in Newcastle to sing “Happy birthday”. In between my bouts of coughing, we chatted about life and where we’re at. It was luverly. It doesn’t matter how old you get, it’s still lovely having your mum to chat with.

It’s true, our relationship hasn’t always been smooth. We’ve had major differences in the past, but since David’s death in 2011, we’ve been able to give “the old hurts” a place and put it all to rest. Heaven knows we’ve tooth-combed everything enough over the years.

We’ve found peace in knowing that if we could have gone back and changed certain things, we would have. This doesn’t mean that we’re always going to see eye-to-eye on everything in the future either, but we don’t have to. What we’ve developed is the freedom to be ourselves with each other.

So today, I’d like to celebrate the life of a fascinating woman, and appreciate her influence on my life.
I love you Mum, happy birthday!!